Is it even possible to have a secret lesbian relationship when your a teen?

I am 14 years old and I've come to terms with being attracted to other girls. I've begun being close to this other girl who admitted to me she likes girls. One of our other friends knows all this but does not care.

My Church believes that AIDS is a plauge sent by God to kill homosexuals and that America in general and Massachusetts in particular are "influenced by Satan!" by allowing Gay marriage. My father thinks homosexuality should be illegal and all homosexuals should go to prison (yeah that will cure them of being Gay). My church and family also believe that George W. Bush is not only a "Good Man" but a "Rightious Man" maybe even a "Holy Man".

The girl I'm seeing often dresses real Goth and is open about being interested in Wicca. My father says she "has to be a dyke" and forbids me to see her. I can't even go out for sports because he thinks all female athletes are dykes.

My point and problem is that I'm not sure if I can ever be free of my family or my stupid church.

I think it is possible. Just make sure to not come out right now and dont tell your parents. Oh and make sure that you and the girl also have an understanding that you have to keep it hidden

wow, i see that you are going through a lot....if you ever decide to come out do it when you are on your own because your parents seem very strict...it is possible to have a secret relationship, however, it may be diffuclt because your dad won't even allow you to have a friendship with the girl

It is very possible. I have and do. You father doesnt have to know who you are seeing.

Does he follow you to school. You can have realationships with people at school. I do.

Well ,wait and see.

I suggest that you keep cool until you are eighteen and then move out on your own.

First of all, good for you for actually being open enough to ask for help and not try to just ignore it. This is you! There is no denying your nature! =]

Onto my answer...

There is no real way to hide it, but your parents can't really forbid you from seeing her. While they can make you go to this church, there is only so much they can legally do to keep you away from her. Try not to defy them in seeing her; instead make plans and let them know they you will be out with friends (and have more people with you so they know you're not lying!).

Until you're 18 and out of the house, it'll be difficult to see this friend, but I'm sure you can make it work and keep this person in your life. I'm sorry that your parents are like this, but once you're out of the house and 18, they really can't stop you.

At this point, don't do anything stupid. Don't sneak out all the time and lie all the time; this just makes you irresponsible. I know you want to talk to this girl, but if your parents say no, there is little you can do. Try not to yell at them; show them that you are mature and not some little kid who doesn't know what she's doing.

You don't have to tell anyone you're gay if you don't want to. It's /your/ choice as to who you tell. Therefor you don't have to tell your parents of your sexual orientation. Eventually, when you're older, it'd probably be good to do so, but right now you have the right to keep who you like to yourself.

Good luck!

All the best,
Shayna

While it may be possible to have such a secret relationship at your age, it is highly unlikely that it will remain a secret for very long especially where your parents are concerned. Here is the unfortunate truth of your situation: you are 14, which means that, for now, you have almost no human rights. Your parents can be as ignorant and oppressive as they want, and there is no legal action you can take against them.

Now for the good news: you are only four years away from turning 18. While four years seems like a long time to you, it will pass much faster than you know. And, when you do turn 18, you can tell your father and your church where to stick their ignorant and hateful attitudes.

Be patient. Your time will come.