CAN YOU PlEASE HELP ME? IN URGENT NEED OF HELP WITH GRAMMAR! PLEASE AND THANKS! EASY TEN POINTS! THANKS!?

In a one-page summary, reflect on your personal development in accordance with the Attributes of a BC Graduate. I just finished answering the above question. I am having difficulty with it so please help me. I need you to check for grammatical errors and please try to spice up the content a bit more to make it sound better. Thanks.

High school has molded me into the person I am today. I am a world apart from what I was when I started school; I've grown up, learned a lot, and broadened my experiences.
I am physically, morally, and emotionally who I always was, but have developed my intellectual person, human nature, and social, and career development.

Intellectually, I have acquired many useful skills. For example, I decided to increase my knowledge base by learning a second language; learning a new language is an extremely useful skill to have in the professional realm. It is also helpful in terms of understanding the world we live in today. I have also extended my ability to think critically and solve problems. Finding solutions to analytical problems, criticism of articles in English, alternative explanations of results in Science, and problem solving in Math have all helped me to improve my critical thinking and problem solving skills. These intellectual skills will help me be ready to face the challenges I will meet in college as well as in my career. High school has also given me the chance to better understand the importance of commitment to continual learning.

As humans, we undergo several changes in our psychological state based on our experiences, and ultimately our psychological maturity. High school was an experience that helped me become a socially responsible citizen who acts in caring and moralistic ways.
My experiences in high school have led me to develop a better understanding and respect for diversity of all people and the rights of others to hold different ideas and beliefs.
I have been through many tough times with my friends that have shaped me and encouraged me to use positive thinking I need to be a healthy individual. All the emotionally trying experiences have made me understand that I have to be more responsible to my physical and emotional well-being. This is now, and forever will, help me to improve the quality of my life.


High school has not only taught me the basics in life, but has helped me to find my own interests. It has given me the chance to be a self-directed individual who displays initiative, sets priorities and goals. High school has helped me pave the wave for pursuing those
goals in an ever-changing, unpredictable society. With the aid of all the teachers who
supported me, I now have a better understanding of the wide array of career choices available to me. I've become better-rounded, and now possess greater skills required to work effectively and safely with others. I have a better understanding on how to work towards my future goals. All the changes and information acquired during my high school career will ensure that I will continue to be a positive aspect in culture and society to come.

"It is also helpful in terms of understanding the world we live in today. I have also extended my ability to think critically and solve problems"

You used also two times in a row, it kind of makes one lose focus; not exactly a grammar error though. You ALSO use the word Also a lot throughout the paper. try removing it a few times. And your tenses are still switching from past to present. Be careful with that. You have a tendency to say has taught... and will teach... all in this one essay. (just an example, not your exact words).


"I have been through many tough times with my friends that have shaped me and encouraged me to use positive thinking I need to be a healthy individual"

perhaps say ... "the positive thinking that I need to be a healthy individual"....

Looks like you already incorportated some of my suggestions and those of others. Its looking great :) Hope we're helping and not making things worse.

pave the way not pave the wave

and fix the last sentence in the next-to-last paragraph

To:Julie
If I free stress,and depressed, I like to go shopping centre.
With my penpal friend,
Hi how are you Julie my name is adillah.
I'm 25 years old.
I like swimming, volleyball,badminton,collecting stickers, collecting stamps, karaoke, playing computer games,
and Chit-Chat on the phone.
I dislikes people who like to complain and busybody.
I dislikes gambling, drinking beer, smoking, drug-addicts, and stealing person.
I dislikes people who act like gangster, and liars.
I dislikes people who be rude at me.
If I have a boy I dislikes to queen control.

I'm glad to see you made some of the changes I suggested BEFORE deleting the question. Very bad form to delete a question that someone has taken the time to answer for you ... and I know there were at LEAST two answers. SHAME on you! Too bad you didn't make ALL of them.