What do you think of these parents, this situation?

My cousin lives with her parents. She just graduated from high school. I was talking with her today about college and she said that she probably can't go because she can't afford it. I know that her father makes like 70 grand a year, and so I am confused as to why she can't afford it, but she told me that she wanted to go to community college to make it cheaper for her parents, but they refuse to pay 4 grand a semester for 2 years so she can get her degree. They also did not allow her to get her driver's license until she was 18, which was very recently, so she could never work and save up money. They never bought her school clothes, she's told me about this several times, and I know for a fact that they didn't even buy her Christmas gifts after she turned 12. Her parents make good money, but have no savings and no equity, they waste their money renting a house, and have even had their cars repossessed because of their own irresponsibility. She told me that last winter that they did not have any heat in their house because her parents did not pay the gas bill, so she would pile blankets on when their house dipped into the high 30's. Her father brings home 70 grand a year, and her mother works part time somewhere too, but both are smokers, which I'm sure is a huge waste of money, and her father has always been a total boozehound.. She can't apply for most financial aid because her parents make too much money, and she told me that they refuse to give her tax information to get FAFSA money..Why can't they afford their daughter's college? They won't even help her with a loan because their credit is so bad..

They make me so angry because my cousin is a beautiful girl and she's very smart (Straight A's) and sweet, so it makes me wish I could take her in, but I can't possibly afford it, I am only in my 20's.



Who do you think is right? Are the parents selfish, or does the daughter expect too much?

I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with my fiance, we're both working but we aren't wealthy, we're trying to finance our wedding. I told her if she wants she can come stay any time she wants, if she's hungry or cold. Unfortunately I can't afford to keep her and pay for college. The college told her that even if she lived on her own, she would not qualify for financial aid because her parents make too much money. She has been going and putting in applications places but no one seems to want to hire an 18 year old with no work experience. I feel really awful for her but I can't do a whole lot to help her. She told me a few weeks ago that she is afraid to take out a loan without a co-signor because she doesn't want to start her life in debt, and be like her parents, and she is afraid she won't find a job to make the payments..

Based on what you've said, the parents are jerks. It's one thing not to pay for your child's college education. It's another entirely to not let her work in order to try to pay for it herself. Is there any way she can live with you or someone else? She could then claim herself and have a much better shot at getting financial aid.

some parents are just idiots the way they live their lives. i hope one day, this cousin of yours teaches them a lesson by not speaking to them for a good period of time. They are just lousy, selfish and stupid.

wayy to long try shorting it and then you could get some answers

The parents are selfish. They dont' want her to get ahead because she'll prove she is better than them. They are wasting $$ on cigarettes, beer and who knows what else. 70k and a part time job isn't all that much money, but it is certainly enough to raise your family with dignity.
Maybe she can get student loans and work and pay for her own college. If not right now, then maybe she can get a good job somewhere and go to college at night. Plenty of people go to college w/out the help of their parents. For her, it just wont' be the traditional way, but encourage her to find her own way.

It's not that the parents are selfish, they sound like they are financially irresponsible. Probably when there were hard times, they used credit cards. $70,000 sounds like a lot, but not when you have a lot of bills.

Since the parents have trouble providing the basic necessities (heat), your cousin should not expect any help from them. She's 18 now.

Have her get a summer or Christmas job. Put away at least 75% of all she makes in a savings account. Hopefully her parents won't make her pay rent. If she could save nearly all her money, she'll have enough for 1 or 2 semesters of college plus books and maybe some left over to put in a money market account (to get more interest).
She can start in February. She can take 12 units to be full time student.

Why can't you afford to take in your cousin? How much money would you need per month? Can you share a bedroom? If she's working and going to school, she should be able to pay you rent.

Often times a college will find seasonal work for their students. I had to quit my job because I needed night classes. The college gave me office jobs every 3 months. She's an A student. Can she tutor other students?

I have had the same problem with my parents. I am now 35 yrs old and never went to college. In my experience, my parents were addicts. all of their money went toward drugs and alcohol. I didn't get my license til i was 22. if i wanted to go to college, i would have had to get a job, get my own bank account, and save my money. I found i to be impossible, because by then I had to also support myself. I had no car. I was lucky to afford rent. I'm still at a dead end job, paying rent. I'm paying into an account for my kids college. they will have it better.