No this isn't a am I bi post. I pretty much knew I was Bi from when I was 11, I liked my best friend (boy) to much and yet still liked girls and would catch myself looking at other guys from time to time, oh how confused I was then. Being in the locker room was so hard. :( Anyways, I made a list of questions, some to get help/options, others to see if I'm 鈥渘ormal鈥?
1. This may sound odd, but can Bisexuals choose who to look at? Because I was at the gym today and figured I would just look at guys... and well I actually lost all interest in women and could pretty much care less about them. This is rather odd for me because I tend to look at women more then guys, though this could be just because women tend to 鈥渟how鈥?more. Want to buy more men in tight pants.
2. This kinda goes with the first question, but is there some days you would rather be with a guy and others you would rather be with a girl and it seems completely random?
3. When did you know you liked both sexes?
4. How much of a problem is it in your life? Am I better off just being 鈥渟traight鈥? no insult intended.
5. How do you tell your family? I don't think I would tell my parents anytime soon, but when I told my sister she just laughed it off and pretty much said I haven't found the right woman yet... And my brother just thinks I'm flat out gay.
6. If I dated a bi-girl would she be more excepting of me dating a guy also and vica versa?
7. How do you convince a girl that just because I like guys doesn't mean I have aids?
8. This is kinda a goof off question but why are the guys in pornos so ugly? I have to look for gay porn if I want someone good looking.
9.How true is the whole index finger, ring finger thing? My ring finger is smaller then my index finger which suppose to mean I'm gay, I mostly just wondering how many more Bi-sexual guy are like this, and I guess girls can comment if they have the opposite.
10. Is it normal to be looking for the same things in a girl or guy, physical(hair, eyes etc.) and emotional? I feel like there should be a difference but there really isn't one with me.
I guess that's it for now, any help/information will be appreciated. I'll pick a best answer. Figure I should add to 7 that I had an STD test done already and its clean, its just annoying as hell that every girl is like, oh my god he likes guys, he has aids! Run for the hills! I don't think I'll be much of a help today...you have very good questions, but they're so good- I might not have answers.
1: I don't think so. I think it's just the way the brain works. Kinda like you mind chooses for you and you have no choice but to go along with it.
2: Yes and yet, no. I don't think it's COMPLETELY random, but I do believe that it depends on the mood you're in. If you are having a bad day and want someone to confide it- I think you start looking at the sex that you find most comforting, and other days if your feeling more naughty, you look at the sex that makes you more aroused. I guess it also depends on where you're at. If you like seeing men with muscles and your at a gym, I would suppose you would be looking at men more.
3: I was in 6th grade, 10 or 11, same as you.
4: Huge problem, but something I am willing to deal with. People at my school believe I am gay/bisexual just because I wear skinny jeans. I have gotten used to the question, "Are you gay?" and I always say "No" For one, that's true, I am not gay, I am bisexual. But then I always feel bad because I kinda did lie and put down my own sexuality. I have gottten used to the names and all that though, because people called me those things before the rumors got started.
5: I guess it depends on your family. No one quite knows your family like you do. My family I would never tell. My Mom isn't homophobic, but my biological dad is. My step-dad thinks its unnatural. I'm only out to my best friend and my ex girlfriend and ex boyfriend. (Who is my exgirlfriends best friend...)
6: No- if shes bi, she understands what your going through and understands your feelings.
7: You don't. People will think what they want no matter what...there is almost no way to change what they think is right...even if its wrong.
8: Because all the pretty guys are either actors, have a job, or are not interested. Besides, everyone knows that the gay men are the hottest. XD
9: I have no clue what your talking about...lol.
10: What do you mean by normal? I don't think there is a "normal" when it comes to love/crushes...etc...If your happy with liking it one way- just be happy, dont question it. LOL.
Good luck. Hope that helped. Now to people who say being gay isnt a choice, what is a bisexual 1. Yes, some bisexuals can choose who to look at. Also, some can't.
2. Yep, but I learned there's a cycle for me, a span of time for guys, a span of time for girls.
3. when I was little, like 7
4. Haha, I would rather live with problems than live in a lie.
5. I don't tell my family... well my sibs I came out and told, my parents on the other hand... there is no way I'm telling them...
6. Maybe, depends on whether she's ok with it... everyone is different...
7. Good question, get an std test and prove it to her...
8. In the straight ones they are ugly because normal guys don't focus on the male, they focus on the female...
9. Not true at all, my index finger is smaller than my ring finger...
10.Oh, that means you are gender blind I think... You don't care so much the gender, just who they are and a general look... I think... I'm not an expert though...
Oh and I'm bi... 1. What do you mean choose to look at? I see both sexes everyday: Some are good looking, some would make a train take a dirt road. If I see someone attractive, I do take notice. Again, you dont choose whom to be attracted, it just happens.
2. It doesn't work that way. Last person I was attracted to was female. It just happened; I didn't plan it. I dont go about saying, 'Today is Tuesday, I'll get excited by a male today. Wednesday is girls day, etc.
3. When I was in college during the Jurassic period, LOL!
4. Being bisexual is not a problem for me now. I accept it just like I accept the fact I'm left-handed and brown eyed. Bisexual is an adjective, not a noun. It is a part of my personality, not my totality. I dont know how old you are, but in general, as you age you learn to accept yourself more.
5. I haven't told my family because I believe it's none of their business. If they are close to you, they already know anyway. I keep me personal life, personal; I have no great need to broadcast it to the entire UK or me family.
6. Depends on the person. All bisexuals aren't alike. People are individuals first. It seems she should be more accepting, but then you wont really know until you ask the person or the situation actually comes up. Personally, I'm monogamous and I expect anyone I'm in relationship with to be monogamous as well.
7. Get tested and show her the results. If you practice safe sex and care about your body, you lessen your risks for HIV transmission. You're responsible for your sexual health. If the woman is so daft she think you have AIDS anyway, tell her to sod off; who needs someone like that in their life?
8. I cant really answer that because I dont watch porn. When I was younger I tried to, but being the over analytical type, I was looking for plot and a storyline, not the sex. If there is no plot, logic or story, it becomes a sex comedy at best. Plus, I tend to view sex in general as amusing and funny. I know; I'm strange, LOL! I prefer to READ sex stories and use me own imagination. :)
9. I dont know about the finger thing. My ring fingers are shorter. I dont know what that means, LOL!
10. Again it depends on the individual bisexual. In males, I am attracted by all ethnic groups, especially Celts and Northern Europeans. I like men with a good sense of humour, intellegence and independent. I like men who are assertive and confident and about my age range. With females I am more attracted to European and Asian women; I dont find African females attractive. The same qualities for the men apply here as well. She must have a good sense of humour, some brains and be independent. Both genders also must be mature and not too balmy, LOL! 1. I don't think I've ever tried to choose who I look at, really. I mean, I choose not to look at my friends like that, but I've never thought, "I just want to look at men today."
2. I have had times in my life when I am more attracted to one sex than the other, but it isn't a day-to-day thing. It normally depends on who I am in a relationship with or who I have a crush on.
3. I knew I was bi at about 12 or 13, though I had suspected it for years.
4. Being bi isn't a problem in my life at all. I'm out and proud and lucky enough to be surrounded by intelligent, caring people.
5. I told my mom and brother in letters. My mom told my grandmother, and I don't even know if other family members know. I don't spend much time with anyone else, so there isn't much reason for them to know.
6. I wouldn't want my partner to date anyone other than me, no matter what sex the other person was. I am bisexual, and I am also monogamous.
7. As a girl, I don't have much problem convincing people that I don't have AIDS. For you, though, your best bet would be to find a girl who understands without having you explain.
8. Ha! I don't watch porn, so I can't tell you about ugly guys. ^.^ The most I watch is kissing. I don't like watching people go farther than that. Odds are, if it's banned from Youtube, I'm not interested.
9. According to the finger-size thing, I should be straight. I haven't really noticed other bi girls and how that works, though I've found it to be true for lesbians.
10. I look for the same things in both men and women, as well, though with slight differences. For example, I like short folks--so for women, around 5'3, for men, around 5'6. But I like long hair, a crooked smile, and glasses for both. And emotionally and mentally, I have the same criteria for both.
Cool survey. ^.^ 1. I suppose you can say yes. I tend to be the opposite of you in the sense that I normally look at boys more than girls, but I have days when I decide to focus more on women. It's just whatever I feel like that day. hahah.
2. TOTALLY! I sway back and forth from day to day.
3. I was ten or eleven... and it just occurred to me one day, "Hmm, I like girls AND boys." At the time, I had no concept of bisexuality or anything, I just knew I was different. heh.
4. It's not too big of a problem, though I foresee it can get messy later in life when you get to the marrying age. I know what you mean with the whole "better off being straight thing" though - I really plan on marrying a girl and leading a normal life.
5. I have absolutely NO intention of ever telling my family. I live in the deeeeep south and can't see that ever going over well. So I can't help you there, sorry.
6. Like you want to date a bi-girl and a guy at the same time?
i suppose a bi-girl MIGHT be more open to it - though you'd have to be open with her dating another girl.
If you're just talking about a bi-girl wanting to date you in spite of the fact that you have dated boys in the past, i would say definitely yes.
7. Hahah, those are just one of those things you have to live with. You can get an AIDS test/donate blood and prove it to them?
8. Straight guys are insecure with their sexuality and attractive men would distract them when they are getting off. ;)
9. My ring finger is bigger than my index finger, so that would make me straight? hah.
definitely not, i'm pretty sure that theory is jank.
10. Nah, i'm attracted to similar things in guys and girls.
it really gets confusing when a guy and a girl you like start dating (cause then you get secretly jealous of both of them... hah.) 1. I guess so, especially if a I have a really big crush, then I just think about that sex the whole time.
2. I don't think it's daily for me, more like monthly, right now though i've been obsessed with girls for like a year.
3. Since second grade, not sexual, just in a "I want to kiss them" way.
4. No, then you wouldn't be happy.
5. I haven't told anyone in my family, and don't plan to until...well I don't ever plan to haha.
6. I think so.
7. If she believes that, don't even waste your time with her.
8.I know, I was always wondering that myself, haha. I don't think the ones in gay porn are good looking either though.
9. My index finger is bigger than my ring and I'm a girl, and I know I love girls, I mean I'm iffy about boys, bit I love girls. I think that's how your hands suppose to be.
10. I think so, because I care about the face way more than the rest of the body. 1. you know, i do the same thing sometimes. it just kind of happens naturally. lately i've been looking at girls a lot more.
2.YES! all the time. i cant explain how much it's happened to me.
3. I knew when i was 11 too. it just kind of happened when i liked my best friend.
4.It's not a problem, and it hasn't been. People say they don't like me and stuff, but i really don't care what they think. they don't run my life, and i don't need them in it anyway. You just be who you are. :]
5. I told my mom first. well besides my closest friend. she didnt take it well. but eventually she got used to it. we havent talked about me liking girls or anything yet. but i know she's not holding it against me. she's the only one in my family who knows.
6.umm i dont really get this question. but im going to take a guess and say probably not. lol
7. The girl just has to be very trusting. VERY VERY trusting. I'd get tested and show her proof that i wasn't (if i wasn't) if i were you.
8. LOL! i know! its weird. i don't know. cause hot guys get better jobs than porn?
9. I've actually never heard of that before. so i don't know.
10. Um sometimes. the first girl i liked dressed like a guy. she talked like a guy and walked like a guy. but she was still a girl and i still liked her. and i like girls who aren't so butch too. it doesnt really matter to me what they look like.
im not sure if this is best answer material here, but it was fun answering your questions. :] |
