SCENARIO:
I had a slight disagreement/power struggle with a female work colleague earlier this afternoon. In a nut shell, we are currently sharing a full-time post. We share one room/office environment with a well proportioned desk/pc. I've been at the work-place for 3 months and apparently, she has been there for 20 years. Although I am installed as one of the main in my role as she is also employed to serve in another area, when I come into work, or ever since I have 'clocked in', my personal belongings head straight for the this particular room. I do admit, it's a little personalised and I treat the desk as my own. Having ssaid that, I am considerate and self sacrificing and whenever she's on the same shift as me, I always give her the 'hot seat' to the desk, plus the PC. She often leaves paperwork and promotional material on the desk.
WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED:
This week, we have been or rather, I have been doing a bit of a 'tidy up' off my own back. In addition, since I've been here, I've been building a resource folder for everybody in the library concerned. I leave these items on the desk as we share or meant to be sharing the desk. She dealt with a client earlier and because she couldn't find (probably misplaced herself) a piece of information to aid the client, she eventually chose to nitpick at the materials I had placed on the desk. She just kept going on and on and in the end I lost my patience. I didn't shout or lose my temper, but I did make a point of showing my exasperation/annoyance. I don't know if this was a wind up but she then became patronising towards me and then tried to play if down with a smug look on her face after me being defensive and telling her why I reacted the way I did. She didn't really speak to me much after. The boss is away and won't be back till next week.
She's in her late 30's early 40's. I one the other hand am a vibrant 31. We both work as Career Advisers. Although she does carry out here duties to help her clients, she often comes across as negative, a little rigid and all in all, a knuckledragger. She doesn't always smile and doesn't know how to have a laugh.
Any ideas on how I should approach this person from now on?? She feels threatened I think. I do like the thought of having my own desk/empire.
All in all, I'm finding it difficult to work with this colleague of late. It seems like double standards. For example, she's alright to leave her paperwork lying around etc, but if I leave a couple of ringbinders of which are informative, she gets all finicky and throws a hissy when she can't find her own pieces of information.
Any ideas I have, anything productive I do, she perceives it all as a negative.
Cheers
Numark RE:georgies - Mentoring and developing disadvantaged people is a real job - thankyou! Some people, whether they've worked on a job for years or one day, tend to become territorial. Apparently by staying at the same job for 20 years, she has stagnated and now feels threatened by you in some way. Typical employee "loyal" to her company. What she doesn't get is "company loyalty" doesn't exist anymore. It went out with milk bottles.
I don't know if this was suggested above, but I'd suggest getting your own In/Out' box, and put your work in it, name on the outside AND on the bottom. When you leave, that box leaves with you. That way, it's clearly defined where your work is, and there's no confusion as to who's work is who's. Take a picture of that box on the desk with your name showing both outside and bottom-as proof.
I'd just ignore her and speak to her only if it's job-related. She doesn't sign your check, your agency does.
Good luck. And remember: no matter where you work, you'll either come across one, or a few, whose job is their life, they're territorial, and will turn a minor incident into a blown-out one. You did right by keeping a cool head. Let it go in one ear and out of the other,do not let her negativity get you down tolerate her but pull her up if she tries it on with her whinging "in a professional" way. x I'd be pretty annoyed if I'd been working somewhere for 20 years and this 'vibrant' 31 year old turned up and started moving all my stuff about. gotta slash her tires bro. Perhaps if you were to put yourself in her shoes for a moment it might help.
For instance she has had this space for 20 years, boy that is some time, and then all of a sudden a younger vibrant tigress comes into the den and your space is now being used up.
No wonder she huffs and puffs in truth I would probably want to poke you in the eye.
So, what to do is become a friend and ally, ask her advice now and again even if you do not need it, make her feel the senior one with the years of knowledge she has gained. A cup of tea would be nice.
Kindness goes a long long way, and 20 years in any job can make you miserable.
Cheer her up, she may have hidden depths that are worth finding. She has stayed there for 20 years so she must be loyal, and a loyal colleague is always useful.
Good luck to the pair of you, hope it all works out. As it's temporary I wouldn't worry about too much. She may be one of those people that has difficulty accepting a replacement for her colleague, even temporarily, so it's not personal in that case.
In the meantime, I would only do MY job and not interfere with her things...not touch her things or organise anything that isn't mine.
I have a colleague who constantly interferes in my job...she's not better than me she's just got a diferent approach but she thinks her way is right and keeps trying to undermine me...so in my opinion keeping yourself to your own duties only is the best way to get along. Deal with SPECIFIC INCIDENTS and dont bunch things all together when you discuss problems with her.
E.g. Dont say you ALWAYS leave a mess and then yell at me.
when she says ' why did you leave this here?' you just say ' well you left that book there yesterday'
end of story.
Try and be calm. How about suggesting that to avoid any misplace items in the future that you both have an in tray or something on the desk, or could you kind of not split the desk, you have files on one side and she has her things the other side?
In the mean time while your boss is away, could you not use another room? maybe the bosses office!! Scenario,pathetic 31 year old with a pointless job moans constantly about fellow employee.Get a real job.One where you can use yourself physically instead of bitching about desk-space. She has been there for a while & you have been there for 5 minutes, you don't say why you were employed, was it to replace someone else or to help her out? If you knew that desk sharing was part of the job when interviewed you can't complain now. Play nice & don't run to the boss so quickly, act like a grown up If you need to ask a question like this in this environment, then face it you are definitely in the wrong job and as you have added its only temporary with obviously not much for you to do.
I know you have done this a bit tongue in cheek, but if real situation you would need to give this other person a bit of credit, they have held their post as you say for 20 years and while it may not be the same department, I assume it is the same company/organisation.
In this time she will have seen and experienced plenty of people like you come and go, people like you who think you are going to build a little empire, what is it you sense a bit of easy pickings, maybe cause a fuss and try to take her job too instead of sharing the role as a temp, when you took the post you obviously agreed to the arrangements if you are finding it difficult working that way, then leave instead of trying to cause conflict between you over a desk.
A lot of temp posts tend to become permenant and if you don't want to leave, try to sit down with the other person and attempt to reach a solution that suits you both, if you can't or wont do this, you have to remember she's been there 20 years, you may be viewed by senior management as only a temp and a trouble maker who cant get along with your colleagues and you may not have a choice over leaving that decision may be made for you.
Also to remember, if you have only been with this organisation for three months your bosses may need a reference from this other person in deciding whether you keep your post or when you apply for others she may be asked to complete your reference
Good luck in your future what ever it may be There's nothing wrong with using your wit and intelligence to put her in her place. Senority only means how much longer someone has been there, not how much they can belittle and push around other people.
I would keep doing what you're doing. If things are really that tidy and stuff, and she gets all in a huff for losing her stuff, just simply ask her "well, where did you put it? I didn't touch it.." or something.. She's been there for 20 years doing her job and then this sprightly 31 year old has come in and started changing and improving things - her nose is out of joint and this is her way of letting you know that she's the boss.
Wait until your actual boss comes back next week and have a chat with them. Explain what happened and ask if they have any suggestions on how to deal with her. They may sit you both down and explain that as it's a job share, you have to learn to work together and set some ground rules which you both have to follow.
I had this problem with an employee and we decided that no paperwork was to be kept on the desk, they each had responsibilities that was theirs and before any changes were made, they had to discuss it with each other and myself.
As for personal belongings, they had their own shelf for pictures etc which the other person wasn't to touch.
I understand that people want their own "place" which is hard when you job share but stick this out and your employer will give you a good report rather than one that says "immature" etc.
KD |
