Christians, is Criss Angel the messiah?

Criss Angel has to be the messiah! It all makes sense! Didn't you see that episode where Criss Angel walked on water? Not only can he walk on water, he can go one step further. He can actually defy gravity. Jesus was skillful enough to make the concept of surface tension work for him in unusual ways, but Criss Angel can freaking fly! He floated from one building to another! Now, why aren't you God fearers/lovers adding a new book of the bible to talk about Criss Angel? I mean... he even has Angel in his name! Criss very closely resembles Christ! It's all there. If Jesus is the messiah, so is Criss Angel. If you don't accept Criss Angel as your lord and savior, God cannot save you, and you will be banished to hell.

You can't say that Criss Angel faked these stunts, because I could just as easily say the same for Jesus. We seriously all need to show the world how completely mentally retarded we are by accepting some random cool guy as our messiah. We could even make up stories about him, like he was born to a grizzly bear with AIDS and despite vaginal birth, emerged without HIV. Let's get to it. Chop chop.

"You can't say that Criss Angel faked these stunts..."

Sure, I can. He's a professional illusionist. That's his job.

As a Christian, I feel that even if one wishes to completely dismiss the miracles attributed to Christ in the Gospels, that still doesn't negate His message. Even if all supernatural elements are stripped away, we still have a core teaching of peace, personal accountability, and charitable living that has had a profound spiritual influence upon people for centuries.

Sounds like the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ has been preached to you and you've rejected the message in unbelief-
A very dangerous place to be, sir.

I say this with the utmost fear of the Lord and sincerity-
May God yet have mercy on you.

Criss Angel is not the messiah! Criss Angel is God! XD

Sorry, but when I saw the words Criss Angel I had to put my two cents in. As a die-hard Loyal, I couldn't resist. Not a Christian though, so I don't know how much my opinion counts for.

dude, really, are you serious... please read the bible and pray that the Lord regenerates you to the truth.

Skipped your meds today didn't you?

honestly, 2 paragraphs just for a lame joke?

ehh, whatever helps you sleep at night.


-Christian

Trollism at its finest