Check this out...very complicated...?

A girl meets a guy in a chatroom. They get along, exchange details and plan to meet for real. They meet and they have so much in common and they have fun together...unfortunately it all ends as the girl admits that she's HIV positive. The guy's reaction breaks her heart; he changes his phone numbers, blocked her on MSN and Yahoo etc. So basically what do u think she should do, she even considers suicide. Who does she trust now, who does she turn to? Was the guy's reaction bad? Should HIV positive people date each other, which is more like discrimination and how would you react in such a situation? Loads of questions here.

Thanx everyone, the real deal is in reality, the guy's reaction is expected, it's scary, but i guess if he gives himself time to think about it, he may consider friendship. HIV-AIDS is serious, there's loads we don't know i guess. Really sad...

So sorry to hear about it, At least being honest keeps the virus from spreading. I have heard of sickos out there that know they have it but don't tell and don't use protection. A broken heart for her is most likely going to keep on happening but honesty can save someones life. I know if I had HIV I would only date those who were also tested and are positive that they have it too. There should be no shame in dating others who also have the virus. It's a very brave thing to be honest about it. If a guy told me he was HIV positive I would not get sexually involved and just remain friends. I wont even sleep with a guy until he's been tested twice within a 6 to 12 month period and even then I have him use a condom until we are married and been tested again. I know it sounds harsh but there is no sex out there that could be good enough that I would want to die for it.

I know this is a bad answer but honestly I would run a mile too.

That sounds like a very sad situation. The guy did over react, but he has a right to be careful, but he could still have remained friends, I don't know how I would react, I would hope to be more understanding, would I sleep with anyone HIV positive, I admit I would be afraid to, doesn't mean I wouldn't be friends with someone who has it though.

yes..........very bad indeeed

I think this guy is maybe unaware of the facts about HIV. Maybe he was just very scared...it's still out of order though. There is no reason why people can't date people with HIV...i think it's a damn shame that people are still ignorant about it.
This girl must hold her head up and try to forget the guys reaction....

Uhm, next time maybe she should be a little bit more upfront about it. I assume they weren't meeting to become car pool buddies, they were pursuing a relationship, hello?

That is just a little life changing, don't you think? Maybe the guy was looking to get married and have kids.

It's sad that someone has to deal with this problem, but equally bad that she misled someone into dating her without telling the truth. No one wants to risk getting HIV just for the sake of the possibility of a relationship with someone. I don't think he handled the situation the best way, but I definitely don't blame him for steering clear of her. Yes, if she wants to date, then she should find other HIV positives and make sure she doesn't get pregnant. I think abstinence is the only sensible and responsible move for this poor girl. Sad, but that's life.

i'll be a 100% honest, i would do the same thing too. not because i'm arogant and mean, HIV scares me just hearing the name and i get all itchy, just trying to be safe you know. i don't blame him, he has the rigth to be scared and date who he wants.

He reacted poorly but someone else might not have done so. A large proportion of this world still has total ignorance with regards to HIV and aids. People with HIV should not be made/feel that they can only date other suffers. That would be crazy. People just need to know about protections and things like that in general. I'm sorry he was so harsh, it reflects poorly on him, not on her. All she can continue doing is being honest with people, sooner rather than later, one day she'll find someone who wont see her as a life-effecting condition but as a person.

Is that girl you?
If the person is gonna meet people on line etc etc.
then before any arrangement is made maybe she should tell the person upfront first.
Then again.
It is hardly a good conversation starter,, is it.
Tough one. ummm. I'm puzzled myself now.

WOW!!! That is one of the saddest Qs i've ever seen on this site. I cannot even think how THAT girl feels, she must be devistated. She fell for someone and has the honesty to tell this guy what her situation is. For him to react like you explained is awful. That girl should never think about suicide because she has hiv, after all just like everyone else in this world she has a heart and wants to share it with someone. As for what she should do? as hard as it may seem to her, possibly she should carry on in the same direction and hope she will meet another Man who is going to be more understanding and Love her for who she is and not like the above mentioned. Hope he realises that one day he might be in a simular situation and want some support and love.
Tell the girl i really feel for her.

Probably not the best move to announce you're HIV over dinner and a first date. I think 99% of the population would react the same as this guy. It was a shock reaction and neither handled it the best they could.

suicide is not an option
that person should not judge the girl by the disease but by personality that was not fair of the man and he was just irrational. a close friend i find is the best person to talk to.

It is good that the girl told the truth. The guy only over reacted. It is also not good that the girl should threaten this guy. She should understand that this is not the last it will happen to her. If she turns to Jesus she will meet someone who will understand her. She should not tire of telling the truth. The guy should go back to the girl and apologise for his actions and just be friends.

I would have ran also, sorry.

You would not see my bum for dust, you've got a problem, why give two people problems.???

very complicated indeed? were you about to get into a sexual relationship? Why did she have to tell him at that particular point of the relationship about the HIV status?

At the end of the day, I know it hurts but maybe it was for the best. If someone can run at the first hurdle, then maybe he is not worth having.

HIV is a very difficult disease to understand. There isn't enough information. All you see in the main media is really sick people with lots of weight loss.

The guy did not understand about HIV or was not in a deep enough relationship to be able to handle the situation. The two people had only just met so it would be easy for him to turn his back on her, he would not realise that he would be upsetting her so much. There are so many mysteries about the illness that if you do not understand it, it can frighten you. Good luck to you anyway.

I know someone who is hiv and he has been in a relationship for 13 years - with someone who isn`t hiv. Don`t know why someone would be tellin you they`re hiv on first date. And why consider suicide ? Are you kiddin ? Person i know lives life to the full, has great life. This is madness you are going on about here.

Surely it would have been more honest and saved a lot of these feelings if it was revealed to the guy about the HIV in the early stages of the conversations. The guy wasn't discriminating....he was shocked which I'm afraid i too would be if someone had let it get that far without telling me. Next time the person with HIV needs to be upfront and let the other person decide whether it is an issue or not..

hmmm... complicated. honestly? I think if a guy told me that - Id probably run too - I wouldnt end contact to the same extremity - but would find it very hard to be with him - even if I did care about him.
I think the girl should just realise that this particular guy isnt worth it and he obviously wasnt right for her.
Its hard to actually put yourself in that situation - for either of them- I know if I had HIV - I would feel discriminated against in romance if a guy I thought cared about me legged it as soon as I told him - but I also can imagine how I would feel if a guy told me this - its an awful complicated situation - you're not wrong!
I guess at the end of the day - if you find someone worth having and genuinely loves you - then he wont run.
xx

i dont think any 1 can really answer that question unless their there in the real life situation themselves i'd like to say that i wouldnt run or say that i would stay but its a hard question sorry

well the women waz honest ,hiv scares the hell out of everyone,but i think he did over react it was a bit heartless of him, he should think what would he do if he was in her position, and she had that reaction to him how would he have felt sad

I think anyone would run unless they get to know her first.