Torn angry and conflicted! I feel like i have to choose between my son and the rest of my family.?

my son is 32, hiv, and an alcoholic. he has chosen to live as a homeless person for years. now the weather is bad and he needs to come indoors to keep from getting sick. however he has not respected the rules, me or my husband. this almost cost me my marriage this week. it will be at least two weeks until i can get my son into treatment, so what do i do send him to a shelter?

ur son needs to learn how to live life the hard way. dont take him in again, take him sumwhere else he can learn to b responsible. im 14 and my parents had a simmilar problem with my uncle. he had a wife and a kid right, and my mom[his sister] had a fight with him b4 AFTER she housed him his wife and kid. He called her a bi*ch and other nasty things. this happened agian except he asked 4 money[his job is at a fast food restaurant!] he didnt get what he wanted and called her more names. now the last time this happened was wen he lost his job and his wife left him to care for his son. we house this bum for like 4 months. her showed the same disrespect ur son is showing to ur home. but my mom HELPED himi get a job and even his own apartment. and how does he repay her? calling her a bi*ch AGAIN just because he hangs out with the "wrong people". soo in other words he is and till this day is an ungrat-full uncle 3times inna row. its not worth your family to house what seems ur ungratful son.

If he truly wanted your help he would respect your rules, house and others. he is freeloading off of you and there is nothing you can do for him until he decides he wants help. maybe living ont the street will help him want to get into treatment., there are shelters for the homeless on cold nights and they know better than anyone where to get help and treatment.
Kick jim out and do not help him, it is tough love and it is hard, but he will seek help sooner without your helping him continue what he is doing now.

Your son is a grown man, and has decided to live like a vagrant. Let him be. Don't give him money, let him know that you love him, and that if he wants a home, he is welcome as long as leave the booze alone and follows the rule of the house, if he can't do that, then send him on his way in love.

And I don't care what religion you do or don't prescribe to, but pray for him. That's best thing to do. In the mean time, yes, you can send him to a shelter. You may also want to see what kind of HIV support system is in place in your community. He probably hasn't dealt with that fact, and is why he has chosen this life. Get into a support group yourself.

I will keep your family in my prayers as well, I hope that all works out well for you guys.

hi
sorry your going thought this my prayers are with you. you and your husband need to stay strong ..your son old anuff to know what he should and shouldn;t do he choose to live on the street not get a job and don;t take care of his hiv and alcoholic problem ...you need to give him a blanket and tell him you love him and everything ...put you have to put your foot down and wash your hands on him ....just pray

you may love him . but he has chosen to live his life like that .
he should not have to rely on his parents at 32 .

let him stay out there for a bit then ask him if he is willing to respect the rules of your house , you and your husband .

his life should not affect your marriage .

i sure help this helped :)
good luck :)

he does not respect himself, how is he going to respect your and yours.? it's his choice. there are rules in life.. rules in heaven, rules in hell. we have to chose life or death. not expect others to live by our choice. he chose not to follow rules gotta let him live the way he wants

Is there a local shelter?

You can't bring him back to your home. Even if it means two more weeks on the street. Bring him blankets and food, but nothing else.

Good luck.

Get him to a shelter, you should not sacrifice your marriage. Just help him out by giving him food, cloth, blanket until he gets where he needs to go.

Kick his A** out back to the street give him blankets and stuff but don't let him get away with disrepecting you son or not you don't disrepect someone when they are trying to help you that just isn't right

Get him in a shelter