Am I Torturing My Boyfriend!?!?!?!?!?

i have a boyfriend but i am still a teenager and i don't want to have sex because i feel there are just too many risks (ex. pregnancy, HIV, AIDS)

about our relationship-------

he is Black and i am Iranian (Persian)

he has actually helped me quite alot because i have just moved to the hood in nyc and he has helped me get comfortable there (i have never lived in a hood before)

now whenever my boyfriend comes or i go out with him i have to admit that i tend to dress pretty sexy and be flirty with him

i just love the attention he gives me

also i lie on top of him alot and we makeout while he's touching my *** usually and we play wrestle ALOT

hes always uhh complimenting me on my "assets"..........u kno like he says im "thick"

but i was wondering am i making it harder (no pun attended lol) for him to go without sex or would it be more like a better than nothing sort of thing for him

If you are concerned with STDs, and don't feel a condom enough protection for you then don't do it. Men don't constantly need sex.

he likes u he is willing to wait

Well your only a teenager and i think it's to early to have sex.

I don't think so, because if he truely loves you, then there would be no sex involved in the relationship. If it's all about the sex he's thinking about, then he's not taking it seriously, so neither should you


and no, you're not torturing him, he is torturing him self

NO DOUBT!
If you want the relationship to last without going to sex, you need to either dress more discretely or stop laying on him!
(Or Both)

Well you're def. not making it better. Seriously, just think about everything you just wrote.

Be clear with what you are willing to do. If he really likes you he will respect your boundaries.

do whatever u choose but remember a guy has his needs

It sounds like he will wait but I guarantee your not making it any easier.

If you don't want to have sex with him because of the risks [and personally I admire that decision], and you've told him that, hopefully he will respect you and not pressure you. If a boy cares about you enough then he WILL wait for you, regardless of how turned on he is. But he refuses to accept your wishes, then he's not worth it and is better off by himself.

Good luck.

I cannot speak for every guy, but if he knows you're not ready then that's it.

Don't feel pressured to do something you aren't ready for.

If you are scared about sex because of pregnancy or disease, you might want to look into safe sex guidelines or forms of birth control so you won't be so scared or nervous when you feel you are ready for sex.

You can keep playing games, when he gets tired he'll go somewhere else if he hasn't already.

Sounds like you are making it hard for him

if he really cares about u, he will not pressure u for sex

Sounds like you shouldnt have a boyfriend at all.

Learn to respect yourself, and find better things to do with your time. All he wants is sex, as with most boys his age.

And as to your attitude and how you say you dress.
You are getting attention, but not the kind you want, even if you dont relize it right now.

I actually am sort of wondering the same thing. My boyfriend and I have gone farther than you guys, but I'm definitely not having sex. I'm just not ready. But if he doesn't have a problem with it, than you shouldn't have to worry.

Well, you must definitely be driving him crazy, but don't have sex if you're not ready. That's what matters most. It's a very easy way to see if a guy really cares about you or not

Just have sex with him. Get on birth control and just do it. You're going to have to do it eventually anyway, you might as well start now. (john... Dixon, Iowa)

That is a lot better than nothing as far as I am concerned...touching is sometimes as exciting as the real thing and when you guys finally decide to go the rest of the way there will be a lot of pent up energy to release...just dont be a tease, get him all wound up and find someone else to please you or to tease...be nice...and there are other solutions to be offered...one is somewhat messy and is known as frottage. This is where you basically lay on top of hm and bump and grind until he ejaculates. The other is actually manually stimulating him (you could wear a glove if youre uncomfortable with the fluids actually tuoching your bare skin). But a lil play wrestling is not boring so he should be alright with that too...just be sure to wait til youre ready and if you want to try those alternative means you talk to him abou them first cause you dont want to give him the wrong ideas, get him all revved up and then tell him there wont be any taking off of the clothes...he should know your plan up front and be okay with that a head of time...
Have fun and be sweet...
BTW, do you have any Persian friends in Texas...? hehehe

I would say that you are making it difficult and you need to be careful. If you know that you are not ready for sex then you have to avoid doing things that you know really turns him on. It doesn't take much to excite a guy, but you can make it worse if you choose to. Just think of how you'd feel if it was the other way around. I have given mixed signals to my previous boyfriends and it really hurt our relationships because they couldn't understand how I said I wasn't ready for sex, yet did things that would contradict my words. Don't invite sexual attention if you know you're not ready for it.

it sounds like you guys don't have good communication. you should be able to tell your b/f how you feel. i think you should wait...you sound young..and you might regret it. has he gotten tested??? if he has then you shouldn't have to worry about stds. talk to him..if you don't feel comfortable then maybe you shouldn't be together. what if you do have sex and you get pregnant...will you be able to talk to him about it???